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Hey, save some of that cake for me. Happy Birthday!
Category: Birthday status update on Sunday, 02.3.13 @ 19:24pm

Thanks for all the birthday wishes. I also accept gifts in the form of beer, casual sex and football tickets.
Category: Birthday status update on Sunday, 02.3.13 @ 19:24pm

Roses are red, violets are blue. You've survived another year, so Happy Birthday to you!!
Category: Birthday status update on Sunday, 02.3.13 @ 19:24pm

The fact that a Facebook reminder told me it was your birthday doesn't make it any less special.
Category: Birthday status update on Sunday, 02.3.13 @ 19:23pm

Halloween = candy. Thanksgiving = food. Christmas = gifts. New years = drinks. Valentines day = sex. Birthday = all of the above. Lucky You and Happy Birthday!
Category: Birthday status update on Sunday, 02.3.13 @ 19:23pm

I think the Airlines should let you exit the plane on the inflatable slide on your birthday.
Category: Birthday status update on Sunday, 02.3.13 @ 19:22pm

Happy Birthday forever to everyone on Facebook!! Whew, glad I got that out of the way.
Category: Birthday status update on Sunday, 02.3.13 @ 19:21pm

Without Facebook, I probably wouldn't have wished you a happy birthday. ツ
Category: Birthday status update on Sunday, 02.3.13 @ 19:20pm

Sorry I'm late I was waiting for everyone else to post their birthday message on your wall so I can cut and paste the one I like best. Here it is "Happy Birthday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Category: Birthday status update on Sunday, 02.3.13 @ 19:20pm

FYI: Birthday cake is the only food you can blow on and spit on and everybody rushes to get a piece. Remember that when its not yours and be nice to your friends today. Happy Birthday!
Category: Birthday status update on Sunday, 02.3.13 @ 19:17pm

Check out our new Multiple Choice Trivia Site
Drink up! And Happy Birthday to somebody somewhere.
Category: Birthday status update on Sunday, 02.3.13 @ 19:14pm

Happy Birthday old friend...(note to self) keep fire extinquisher handy just in case.
Category: Birthday status update on Sunday, 02.3.13 @ 19:14pm

Thank you guys for the birthday wishes. And thank you Facebook for reminding them.
Category: Birthday status update on Sunday, 02.3.13 @ 19:13pm

It's hard to find a birthday present that says "I think your a douche but I still want a piece of your cake please."
Category: Birthday status update on Sunday, 02.3.13 @ 19:13pm

Got an awesome watch for your birthday. It was waterproof, shockproof, fireproof, bulletproof, acidproof, childproof & scratchproof. I lost it though. Sorry, Happy Birthday :)
Category: Birthday status update on Sunday, 02.3.13 @ 19:12pm

I use my birthday as an excuse to do whatever the hell I want. So basically it's just like every other day, except with presents.
Category: Birthday status update on Sunday, 02.3.13 @ 19:11pm

In celebration of turning a year older, I'll be wearing my birthday suit all day.....so just make sure that's my HAND you're shaking at church tomorrow!
Category: Birthday status update on Sunday, 02.3.13 @ 19:10pm

I'm sorry but if someone busted out of my birthday cake, they better have another cake in their hands because I really like cake.
Category: Birthday status update on Sunday, 02.3.13 @ 19:10pm

For my birthday I asked jesus for a bike, but realized he didnt work like that. So I stole one and asked for forgiveness.
Category: Birthday status update on Sunday, 02.3.13 @ 19:09pm

Every year the Justice League puts kryptonite candles on Superman's birthday cake,, just to fool him into thinking he's getting too old.
Category: Birthday status update on Sunday, 02.3.13 @ 19:08pm

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