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It must be impossible to stand out as a prostitute working on Halloween.
Category: Halloween status update on Saturday, 10.22.11 @ 12:44pm

I'll be spending most of today putting Santa hats on all my Halloween decorations.
Category: Halloween status update on Saturday, 10.22.11 @ 12:43pm

That akward moment when a Zombie is looking for brains and it walks right past you..
Category: Halloween status update on Saturday, 10.22.11 @ 12:43pm

Reason #43 that I had children: I get to play "candy inspector" after Trick-Or-Treating on Halloween.
Category: Halloween status update on Saturday, 10.22.11 @ 12:42pm

Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it.
Category: Halloween status update on Saturday, 10.22.11 @ 12:41pm

gonna wear a Charlie Brown costume this Halloween and give everyboby who comes to my door a ROCK.
Category: Halloween status update on Saturday, 10.22.11 @ 12:40pm

If the zombie apocalypse ever happens, I'm just going to surround my house with outward facing treadmills. I should be fine.
Category: Halloween status update on Saturday, 10.22.11 @ 12:39pm

wants to remind you this Halloween, that as a general rule, don't solve riddles that open portals to Hell.
Category: Halloween status update on Saturday, 10.22.11 @ 12:26pm

hopes this Halloween, he doesn't end up with a bag full of restraining orders again.
Category: Halloween status update on Saturday, 10.22.11 @ 12:25pm

forgot to buy candy for the kids this Halloween but will offer them a bite of his sandwich.
Category: Halloween status update on Saturday, 10.22.11 @ 12:25pm

Check out our new Multiple Choice Trivia Site
wonders if Lady Gaga dresses up as a normal person for Halloween?
Category: Halloween status update on Saturday, 10.22.11 @ 12:24pm

The Police departments should be required every Nov 1 to post mug shots of people arrested in their Halloween costumes. 
Category: Halloween status update on Saturday, 10.22.11 @ 12:19pm

When witches go riding, and black cats are seen, The moon laughs and whispers, ‘tis near Halloween.
Category: Halloween status update on Saturday, 10.22.11 @ 12:18pm

When black cats prowl and pumpkins gleam, may luck be yours on Halloween.
Category: Halloween status update on Saturday, 10.22.11 @ 12:17pm

Sometimes I wish there was a zombie apocalypse just so I can hit a certain few people in the face with a shovel.
Category: Halloween status update on Saturday, 10.22.11 @ 12:16pm

Could I borrow your face for Halloween?
Category: Halloween status update on Saturday, 10.22.11 @ 12:16pm

On Halloween, the parents sent their kids out looking like me.
Category: Halloween status update on Saturday, 10.22.11 @ 12:15pm

You might be a redneck if : the Halloween pumpkin on you porch has more teeth than your spouse.
Category: Halloween status update on Saturday, 10.22.11 @ 12:14pm

Hold on, man.  We don’t go anywhere with “scary,” “spooky,” “haunted,” or “forbidden” in the title.
Category: Halloween status update on Saturday, 10.22.11 @ 12:13pm

H☠A☠L☠L☠O☠W☠E☠E☠N☠
Category: Halloween status update on Saturday, 10.22.11 @ 12:12pm

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