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Thousands of the best, funny, witty, hilarious, crazy, silly Facebook statuses and sayings. If you are looking for a funny status or funny saying, you can find them here.

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With all the controversy surrounding the Patriots, their fans are just hoping for a better performance in this year's Super Bowl, since their previous two appearances have left the fans feeling a bit deflated...
Posted By: The Gregarious B.O.B. - Category: funny status update saying on Wednesday, 01.28.15 @ 13:53pm

Am I the on one who noticed they never actually say the word zombie in the show the walking dead they called them WALKERS, Roamers, Lurkers, Biters ,lame-brains ,geeks , Monsters, Meat Puppets, Empties , Deadie, Creepers , Eaters , Ghouls , Wanderers , Creepy Crawlies , Walking Bodies , Walking Corpses , Skin-Eaters , The Infected , Stinkers , Rotters but never called them zombies
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 01.27.15 @ 21:43pm

#Hashtag. That is all.
Posted By: Ken - Category: funny status update saying on Tuesday, 01.27.15 @ 11:17am

SocialMeltdown2015 is the reason I updated my profile picture on Myspace.
Posted By: TekNizzy - Category: funny status update saying on Monday, 01.26.15 @ 23:56pm

Katy Perry: It makes me want to "ROAR" when i hear Taylor Swift's new single "BAD BLOOD"
Posted By: My Name is Pie ^w^ - Category: funny status update saying on Monday, 01.26.15 @ 17:21pm

justin bieber has less followers than grumpy cat
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Monday, 01.26.15 @ 16:52pm

If you fall i will be there - Floor
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Monday, 01.26.15 @ 11:45am

If you can't imagine yourself dropping the mic at the end of your essay, then your essay isn't done...
Posted By: The Gregarious B.O.B. - Category: funny status update saying on Monday, 01.26.15 @ 05:52am

I know who is gonna win The Super Bowl!! The team with the most points.
Posted By: Ken - Category: funny status update saying on Sunday, 01.25.15 @ 11:30am

As a young child, my parents told me I can be anyone I want to be. Apparently that's now called "Identity theft".
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Sunday, 01.25.15 @ 06:01am

Check out our new Multiple Choice Trivia Site
WHAT DO WE WANT!!! A cure for hangovers. WHEN DO WE WANT IT!!! Please stop shouting.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Sunday, 01.25.15 @ 00:49am

Numberetti spaghetti with hot paprika - my addition to the culinary world. Tomorrow I'm going to try to make pi.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Sunday, 01.25.15 @ 00:48am

I love being in a relationship till I hear the words "the rest of our lives"...that sounds like a really LONG F-ing time
Posted By: Kash America - Category: funny status update saying on Saturday, 01.24.15 @ 19:28pm

I heard you're a player, well nice to meet you. I'm the coach
Posted By: Valmary J - Category: funny status update saying on Saturday, 01.24.15 @ 14:41pm

I always try to purchase the grocery seperator but every cashier I go to keeps putting it back.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Saturday, 01.24.15 @ 13:55pm

I'm not hungover, I'm just exhausted from drinking excessively last night.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Saturday, 01.24.15 @ 12:42pm

adding "asking for a friend" at the end of a stupid question to minimise collateral damage
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Saturday, 01.24.15 @ 08:22am

If you hold a seashell to your ear, you can hear the sound of your nephew telling you to stop pretending the seashell's a phone and grow up.
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Saturday, 01.24.15 @ 00:27am

I'm as confused as a baby in a topless bar..
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Friday, 01.23.15 @ 21:16pm

Don't get your knickers in a twist... nothing is resolved and it only makes you walk funny
Posted By: Guest - Category: funny status update saying on Friday, 01.23.15 @ 21:15pm

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