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The liquor store clerk just wished me a Happy New Year. As if he wasn't going to see me 5 more times before then.
Category: funny Drinking status update on Sunday, 12.30.18 @ 14:23pm
Happy hour leads to several hours of lying on the floor talking to my dog.
Category: funny Drinking status update on Sunday, 12.30.18 @ 14:23pm
Every loaf of bread is a tragic story about a field of grain that could have become beer but didn't.
Category: funny drinking status update on Sunday, 09.30.18 @ 13:09pm
Drinking rum before 10am makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic!
Category: funny drinking status update on Sunday, 09.30.18 @ 13:08pm
If you get excited that jumping on the bed won't spill the wineglass on the other side, you're probably an alcoholic.
Category: funny drinking status update on Sunday, 09.30.18 @ 13:05pm
Lobster tail and beer are three of my favorite things!
Category: funny drinking status update on Sunday, 09.30.18 @ 13:03pm
I hate when I’m walking into the gym and the wind blows me into the liquor store.
Category: funny drinking status update on Saturday, 06.9.18 @ 06:44am
I can't wait for the day when my kids are old enough that I can drink with them and not because of them.
Category: funny drinking status update on Saturday, 06.9.18 @ 06:41am
You call it "Blacking Out" I call it a "Surprise Nap"
Category: funny drinking status update on Saturday, 05.19.18 @ 09:02am
Imagine how out of control drinking would if we didn't have hangovers
Category: funny drinking status update on Saturday, 05.19.18 @ 09:02am
Check out our new Multiple Choice Trivia Site
Hard liquor because I don't don't have time or patience to sit around drinking 9 bottles of wine every day
Category: funny drinking status update on Saturday, 05.19.18 @ 09:01am
"No I don’t need any help. I know more about booze than you do" - Me to the liquor store clerk
Category: funny drinking status update on Sunday, 05.6.18 @ 12:43pm
Running shoes? No, I don't run. These are my "better hurry up the liquor store is about to close" shoes.
Category: funny drinking status update on Sunday, 05.6.18 @ 12:41pm
Fruit cocktail is the most disappointing of all the cocktails.
Category: funny drinking status update on Wednesday, 04.11.18 @ 18:28pm
If you mix vodka, orange juice and milk of magnesia... Do you get a Phillips screwdriver?
Category: funny drinking status update on Wednesday, 04.11.18 @ 18:28pm
It's amazing how different the phrases "alcohol free" and "free alcohol" are.
Category: funny drinking status update on Saturday, 02.17.18 @ 12:24pm
Saying I have a drinking problem is like saying Bruce Lee had a kung fu problem, it's not a problem if you're good at it.
Category: funny drinking status update on Saturday, 02.17.18 @ 12:21pm
My panic room is a walk-in beer cooler at the liquor store.
Category: funny drinking status update on Sunday, 01.28.18 @ 10:39am
As a man I am so thankful I don't have to give birth. I could never go nine months without drinking.
Category: funny drinking status update on Sunday, 01.14.18 @ 23:53pm
For once I’d like to get kicked into a bar
Category: funny drinking status update on Saturday, 12.23.17 @ 14:39pm